The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
