this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
