Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Randomize
