I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Randomize