that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
