I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
