sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
