Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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