Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
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