what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
