Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Randomize
