dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
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