Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
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