I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
