We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Can you repeat that, but with context?
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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