I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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