he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
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