Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
where am i from again
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
