that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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