If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
