Why are handjobs necessary in class?
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
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