Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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