I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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