the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
