ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
