used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
