Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
