Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
