I am puke
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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