My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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