don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
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