I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
