I can't watch pbs sober anymore
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
tonight lets celebrate not being married
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
We are two peas in an std pod
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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