You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
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