I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
