I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize