Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
