It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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