I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Randomize
