Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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