I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
its not stalking. its research.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Randomize
