I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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