Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
