Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Don't make out with my wife yet
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Randomize
