whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
