I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
This house was built for laser tag.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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