I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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