you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
