woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
The power of my boobs compel you
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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