you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
