Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Randomize
