quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
