dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
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